3rd Degree Burns, and you can still LAUGH!

Amusing Incidents in The Burns Ward As a 3rd Degree Burns patient, my time in the Burns Ward was not all needles and pain.

There were some 'fun' times
. Maybe my sense of humour is weird, but I still get a chuckle when I recall them.

  • Like when I got caught taking the top of the toilet cistern to get a prohibited drink of water. I had such a HUGE thirst.
  • When Aileen (my wife) brought in a couple of bottles of champagne to celebrate our 25th wedding anniversary, a couple of nurses, Aileen & Judy, shared it with us.
  • When I had a bladder infection and had to do a “mid stream urine test”. Me, with one arm and 3 sample bottles to fill. So I said to the Assistant in Nursing,  “Katie, which one do you want to hold?” and of course she chose the bottles.
  • Another time I had coughed up the feeding tube which went down to my stomach through my nose and had come up out of my mouth. Being a bit of a “do it your-selfer” I pulled it all the way back and out, what a great sensation!
    The nurse at the time was Clair, with the most gorgeous violet eyes that I have ever seen, and she made me drink the whole bloody bag of chocolate whatsit with a spoon, while I was trying to marry her off to one of my sons.
  • When I was in the operating theatre for another skin graft, and the nurses were trying to find a vein in my foot for the anaesthetic line. They were having a lot of trouble, and the surgeon, who was Paul, said so very sarcastically, "Why don't you try for the Jugular?" If I hadn't been so dosed up on Pre Med I think that I might have left.
  • One night I half woke out of a very drugged sleep to see a nurse, Denise, dragging a bulky bag down the corridor, and I was quite certain that it contained the body of one of the Male nurses from the previous shift. I tore all the tubes and wires out and staggered down to check things out. But it was only dirty bed linen!
  • A few times we had a dozen or so Physiotherapy students visit the 3rd degree burns ward where there were several warm Saline Baths with patients being worked on. Can you imagine the atmosphere in there, Steamy, with the odour of burnt human tissue, and the sight of burnt bodies. Well, you could bet that there would be at least 3 or 4 keel over in a faint, and they sure did.

The ability to see the funny side of things is a great panacea for any illness,
and although it has got me into trouble at times, it sure helped me through this, and contributed to my becoming a 3rd Degree Burns survivor.

I had to leave the RBH a bit early as they had to clear out the Ward 2C to eliminate the MRSA bug. I still had raw, open wounds on my ribs, about the size of a dinner plate, as well as a dose of MRSA, but Aileen got a pressure cooker course on how to handle it, so we went home.

After 3 months in the Burns Ward it felt great.

Then 12 months of really hard work started.(for her)

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Grafted Eye-lids Not rated yet
I Don't know if this is true or not, but it is a great yarn. This burns patient had full thickness burns to his face, and his eye-lids were completely …

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